What not to say to a grieving mother...

There is someone in my life that made the statement yesterday that really upset me...
Iwent over to see this person and I asked this person if they would like to see the pictures from the ultrasound that I had today, I was so proud of how good they were and thought this person would like to see them. This person said no they saw it on facebook and followed it up with "I'm concerned your so obsessed with this whole thing" I replied "well you've never walked around knowing your dead baby is still inside of you" she shot back "that was disrespectful" ... Um really!?!?! I'm THE ONE THATS DISRESPECTFUL?? ARE YOU GOSH DARN KIDDING ME??? This same person also said that they didn't understand why I want to deliver the baby and bury IT.(not her, it) I just walked away.. I couldn't even confront it.. I refuse to cry anymore!
I am trying to shake it off. But frankly I'm so angry over what was said.

I think for a woman who found out her baby died 5 days ago I am quite functioning!!   I am starting to get upset by what some people are saying to me.

#1 why do you insist on not getting a D&C
My response: I am not judging women who get d&c's...  If that helps you move in and get closure great!! I however want to deliver my baby and bury her to help me get my closure.

#2 why do you want to bury her? Her soul isn't there anymore...
My response: Because I really pray you don't throw me away with Medical waste when I die! Not to mention experts say if you bury your baby it helps with closure. Which I know it will.

#3 I really don't understand why your so upset, you were only 11 weeks along.
My response: a baby is a BABY. No matter how big or small. I got aa special experience with my Eliza! She has let me know her existence for almost 2 years!! Once pregnant she visited me in spirit often! Even told me her name only 5 hours after finding out I was pregnant! I know what she will look like in the afterlife, I have talked to her. You may call me a bit job, but I believe that it's cause I have a close relationship with my daughter that knew her mommy wouldn't get to snuggle he in real life. I appreciate those experiences, and hold them dear.

#4 will you try again soon?
My response: Eliza still isn't out yet, lets not discuss this till later please..

#5 how is your family taking it
My response: I don't know they're all roving the stages of grief every few hours just like me... However I can only speak for myself. I'm mostly settled in acceptance I've been hitting a couple mins of anger, or sadnes here and there. It's not rage or depression so I feel like I'm doing pretty darn well!! I'm worried when she comes into the world it will hit me hard, so I'm enjoying the days of being ok.

#6 please don't say nothing, but don't say too much.
One of my best friends won't even look at me let alone talk to me. Perhaps it's bringing up her own issues of a miscarriage she had 15 years ago, but still.. I would expect one of my best friends to be offering her live and support, but I'm getting nothing. It makes me feel like she really could care less. Even though I know she probably does.
 Another friend thinks that talking to me about her current healthy pregnancy would make me feel better, news flash, it doesn't.  I'm glad your pregnant um so happy your baby is healthy. But right now complaining about our OB not giving you a 3D ultrasound of your 6 week old ivf tripplets that are bearly even noticable on an ultrasound and she's pissed I GOT one of my dead 11 week old baby.
We already discussed the friends that are trying to convince me to d&c.
And then... Friends that just cry at me... Especially those that have lost babies as well. I'm gonna say this as sensitive as I can. I get that you've lost a baby too, I get that your trying to empathize with me cause you've been there. But I can't take the crying anymore!!  Im sorry if I sound insensitive when I say I don't want to hear about your miscarriage story. (I can handle it if it's breif 2-3 min story but a 15 min diatribe is about the point where I want to punch you) I want to think positivly and look to the best of things right now and I dint want to be brought down!

On the flip side:
The BEST THINGS TO DO  WITH ME RIGHT NOW..
#1 offer to take my kids for a little bit and do something fun with them.
#2 offer to come over and play games with me (I have about 150 games and I love playing them)
#3 do things that make me laugh smile and enjoy life!!
#4 Offer to come watch a funny movie with me.
#5 Offer to clean my kitchen what woman wouldn't appreciate this?
#6 Offer to make my family dinner.

Just a handful of suggestions if you don't know what to do...

I appreciate every person that's reached out to me!! I appreciate everyone that has come to "babysit" me while my husband has been at work. I appreciate every text, Facebook message, comment, or phone calls... Even though I may not have answered, or may not have responded.. I've appreciated them all!!

On a positive note:
At my appt yesterday we got 3 really good pictures of dear Eliza. One you can see all 4 limbs and her head... She looks like a teddy bear it made me very happy! And he flipped it to the 3D (I didn't know he was going to do that) and he got a VERY CLEAR picture of her!! It looks like she is holding her hands to her face like she's crying. It is very precious to me!!

My dear friend Ethan dug her grave hile yesterday, and we picked out what we will bury her in. I am pretty happy its all ready for her to arrive!!

I think it will be less stressful for me when she does come!